Real Talk: Social Media, Sleep Training, and What Actually Matters

If you’ve ever found yourself sleep deprived in the middle of the night, feeding or rocking your baby while scrolling through your phone—I’ve been there too. Three times now, actually.

One minute you’re reading something super scientific about melatonin, and the next, someone on TikTok is warning you that if your baby isn’t bed sharing until age five, you’re ruining their sense of safety. It’s a lot.

I bring honesty, empathy, and a bit of humour into my work because this stage of life is both beautiful and exhausting. Sometimes it’s nice to hear someone to say, “It’s a lot to sort through, but you don’t have to do it alone.”

We all scroll the internet for advice; however, what we take in online can seriously shape how we parent, especially when we’re already feeling tapped out, uncertain, or just desperate for sleep.

What About Sleep Training and Attachment?

I want to be super clear from the beginning: I’m not here to judge your choices. If what you’re doing is working for you, that’s great, keep going.

Alternatively, if you are:

·       Rocking, holding or bouncing every single hour

·    Popping the pacifier back in countless times (this was me!)

·       Feeding multiple times a night

·       Co-sleeping but feeling touched out

·       Starting to realize your current routine just isn’t sustainable

Then I want you to know it’s okay to want something different. You can make changes without damaging your bond with your baby. That fear around sleep training and attachment is common, and it’s loud on social media, but it’s also not the truth.

Does this sound like a familiar night?

For example, you have a 6-month-old. Your night goes something like this:

·      Your baby nurses to sleep

·      Wakes up 45-60 minutes later, Dad pops the pacifier back in

·      Wakes again a couple hours later, mom nurses to sleep

·      Another wake, Mom nurses again

·      Next wake, Dad rocks back to sleep

·      Eventually baby ends up in your bed

For all those wake ups, you are showing up and meeting your baby’s needs every single time. However, from your baby’s perspective, it might be really confusing. Sometimes they fall asleep feeding, others in Dad’s arms, sometimes in your bed. There’s no pattern and nothing to rely on.

Babies thrive off of routine and consistency. When things feel unpredictable, they can feel unsure of what will happen next - cue crying. That doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong, it just means there’s room for more consistency.

So What is Sleep Training?

Sleep training is not about letting your baby cry without support. It’s about creating a rhythm that feels safe and familiar. With sleep training, your baby goes into their crib awake at roughly the same time each night. They fall asleep in the same place, in the same way. If they wake during the night, you respond the same way each time. This builds comfort, safety and trust.

Eventually, your baby starts to think, “This is where I sleep. This is how bedtime works. I’m safe here.” Their crib becomes their cozy, secure space. It’s where they rest deeply, wake up happier, and know their parents have supported them.

Sleep Training is Supportive

I know the words “sleep training” have a lot of strong opinions. However, it’s simply teaching your child how to sleep in a consistent and supportive way.

If you’re worried about attachment, I get it. However, secure attachment is built through responsiveness and trust, not through being available every second of the day and night.

You’re not ignoring your baby. You’re helping them learn with you by their side. That’s a powerful, nurturing kind of love.

Boundaries Are a Form of Love

Being a present parent doesn’t mean saying “yes” to everything. Attachment is built through connection, and part of that is setting clear, caring limits. When you set a routine and stick to it, you’re saying, “I care about your rest, I’m here to support you and I’m helping you build healthy sleep habits.” All of this builds deep rooted connection.

Here’s Your Permission to Do Something Different

If your current routine works for you and your baby, that’s amazing – stick with it.

But if you’re exhausted, second guessing everything, and wondering if you’re allowed to want a better night’s sleep—let me tell you that you are.

• You can to sleep train if you choose.

• You can protect your own rest - sleep is a necessity, not a luxury

• You can do what works for your family.

• You are still a loving, attentive parent no matter how you choose to handle sleep.

At MetaSleep, I work with families who are struggling with naps, night wakings, or sleep routines that just are no longer working.

If that sounds like you, book a free 15-minute call. I will listen and learn to what is happening with your baby’s sleep. I will then walk you through how we can work together to create a plan that makes sleep more manageable for your family. Sleep is on the way!